Life can quickly get overwhelming, and if you allow yourself to be paralyzed by waiting for perfection, you will miss out on many opportunities.
As I have finished my OCD treatment and returned back to normal everyday living, I have found myself writing less and less. Part of the issue is the natural hustle and bustle of life. But as I step back for some introspection, the brutal truth is that I have been avoiding it. I have been waiting to have something truly meaningful to say.
I need to stop waiting and start writing.
While I was in the middle of intensive treatment, it was clear to me that I was writing to benefit my mental health. But after graduating from treatment, I was taking less time to think about myself—how I was doing and how to improve. In many ways, that is a good thing. I am going to be happiest as I seek to make other people happy. But as in all things, a balance must be achieved.
Deep down, I know that part of what has held me back from writing more is the feeling of shouting into the void. There is not a large reader base waiting for me to publish again, and so the pressure is less than in other areas of my life. However, throughout the course of this year, I have learned that writing is a helpful exercise for me and my mind. I do not need an audience. I am my audience. The act of processing my thoughts sufficiently to express them is healthy and productive, and requires no other validation to be worthwhile. Hopefully I can remember that.